The Past 2 Years, Part 3

To survive at the shelter, you had to follow the rules.

1. Wake up Monday – Friday at 5:30, Saturday – 6:30, Sunday – 6:00

2. Residents must leave the shelter by 8:15AM and can return at 5:00PM

3. Dinner at 6:30 (Mondays at 6:00PM)

4. Lights out at 10PM

5. Mondays at 7:00 PM, residents must attend Bible study

6. Tuesday Morning – strip bed so sheets can be washed

7. Chores – daily each resident can have a morning or evening chore, sometimes one or the other, sometimes both, sometimes neither

8. Church attendance is required every Sunday

Believe it or not, a lot of people left because they couldn’t follow the rules. Many people who could have come to the shelter didn’t because they felt they couldn’t abide by the rules. The way I saw it there are rules everywhere you go. You have rules at your house so why wouldn’t you have rules somewhere else? Besides, with 20+ women of various ages and backgrounds, you must have rules.

To me, the rules were a small price to pay. There was no rent to worry about. No utilities. The only money I had was the money from the sale of my car and I was okay. Speaking of car, … this whole time, I had no way of getting around. I bummed rides with friends but now. I had to learn the bus system.

Even though things were a bit better, I was far from out of the woods. During the day, the van would take most of us to the Salvation Army for the day. It was a shelter too but unlike the shelter I was in this shelter allowed for mothers and children (mine was just for single women). I hated that shelter. There was so much stress, daily fights and yelling matches. The negativity was overwhelming.

Between the Salvation Army and the relentless browbeating, I was giving myself daily, I had to do something. The soundtrack that played in my mind replayed me losing my home, and my car, not being able to find work, not having anything saved. Basically, I brought all this on myself because I was a loser. If things were going to change, it was going to be up to me.

I developed a list of positive Christian-based affirmations and I made a point of reading those and reading my devotional every morning before I got out of bed. I also read my affirmations at night. I realized that God has placed me on a journey, an adventure. Looking at new places and new experiences as part of an adventure made things bearable. By looking at things with an eye towards adventure, it became almost fun.

I rode the Trolley (which is free in Charlotte). I got used to taking the bus. I discovered the library system. I went to the community college and found my own little nook with a window that I enjoyed sitting in.

I took the trolley during the day to PRN (Promise Resource Network) as an alternative to Salvation Army. PRN was more, well, promising. It was a place for people in addiction recovery or dealing with mental illness. They had classes, meditation and arts and crafts. It was a lot more positive. I had several friends at the shelter who drove cars. Sometimes I didn’t have to ride the trolley, I could get a ride.

My sheep course evolved into a four lesson course. I also started two more courses one on diverse biblical women (Beyond Proverbs 31) and one on understanding money (Jesus & Money). Both courses had five lessons. I started to wonder if this could be a business and I thought about doing a business plan.

When I wasn’t at PRN, the community college or on occasion the Salvation Army, I was at McDonald’s (when I had the money). I could plug in my laptop and use their free wi-fi. By this time, it was mid-July and I had started asking God how much longer I’d be there at the shelter.

Mid-August, I woke up with the answer ringing in my head. “Finish your courses (sheep, women, money) and your business plan and then you can leave the shelter”. I wanted a job, not a business. This was not my voice at all. Yet the business used all the skills the Lord had blessed me with. The doors to a job had remained closed. Could this be what God was leading me to?

I got to work. The ladies at the shelter rarely saw me without my laptop. I worked. With three courses, I had 14 lessons plus a free lesson for my website. Each lesson was its own instructional design project. I had to research, write, design, animate, record, edit and mix narration, sync the narration with the animation and then save the whole thing as a video. This was done for 15 lessons. Yes, it was a ton of work.

It was mid-September by the time I finished, then I spent over a week on the business plan. I had a SCORE (Service Corps of Retired Executives) mentor who I sent to. All the sudden, I was done.

Days later, I got a call from my stepmother in Cleveland asking me to come and help with one of her aging relatives. I would have free room and board and a small stipend. And I could bring Benji (whom I hadn’t lived with since June)

God answered my prayer

As much as I didn’t want to be back in Cleveland, this felt like the right thing to do.

I’ve been here for just about a week now. It hasn’t been easy. I’m not a professional caregiver and learning everything I have to do will take some time. The refrigerator has died and everything in it has been ruined.

But I have learned what Paul said in 1 Thessalonians 5:18 is true. “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” So, I am thankful for my time at the shelter, for the time I spent with the hubs in Ghana. I am grateful to be in Cleveland, now. I am thankful for the lessons I have learned. I will save money and be a good steward of what I am given. I am learning to be gracious and as forgiving to myself as I am towards others.

It took 3 installments to tell this story, and it isn’t over yet. I don’t know where this adventure will take me but I’m here for it!